First things first, this is easier said than done.
- Wear that killer outfit out.
Take that item that’s been sitting in your closet and make an outfit with it.
First, wear it around your house or, if you’re afraid of what your family or roommates will say, your room. (Baby steps!) Even if it’s just for a couple hours, get comfortable in whatever piece you love but are scared to show the world.
Next, wear it somewhere that you don’t know anyone. Wearing a bold outfit to school or to a friend’s house can be intimidating if you’re scared someone will make a comment. When someone comments on my outfit—even to hype me up—it makes me second-guess what I’m wearing. I suggest going to a grocery store in a town over, a park where you won’t know anyone, or anywhere else you won’t feel intimidated by people because you’ll most likely never see them again. Even if you get strange looks, it doesn’t matter thanks to anonymity.
Now, repeat steps one and/or two as many times as it takes before you finally feel comfortable wearing your badass look in front of people you know! By this point, you should feel comfortable in your fit.
1b. Also, try wearing a wig out in public. This gives me a power that is almost scary because I feel like I can do or say anything without any social repercussions. (This may just be me, though—so practice at your own risk.) Any wig will do, personally I think the more wack the better.
- Practice going out alone.
Some of my best and happiest times have been while hanging out with myself. There seems to be a fear that people will judge you for being alone in public. In reality, people just don’t care that much. Going to a park, coffee shop, the beach, or wherever else interests you—by yourself—will give you time to reflect on what an awesome, powerful human you truly are.
- Have fun.
If you prioritize having some plain old fun over everything, it won’t matter how you look to others. Feeling happy will yield much more serotonin than leaving an event knowing that you “looked good” or “didn’t mess up” socially. People will see the confidence pouring out of you, and that’s hot.
- Love yourself.
It’s cheesy and everyone says it and it’s much harder said than done, but hopefully the three previous tips will help just a little bit in achieving this one. Like I said before, confidence is hot and confidence only comes when you’re truly comfortable in your skin. Say some daily positive affirmations and really mean them.
Photos by Jillian Michael and Grace Wiehl